breathe me
by hollister14
Summary: when kim and jack aren't friends, and jack is dating kelsey, kim is depressed and jerry is there to comfort her. but when one day, jack goes to far. will kim decide on killing herself? or will she decide on fighting for her friend back? kim/jack and a little kim/jerry rated t for some language
1. the cold, hard, truth

**I don't own kickin it**

_*Help I have done it again._

_I have been here many times before _

_Hurt myself again today and the worst there is no one else to blame*_

Kim's pov

5 damn months.

5 damn painful months, it has been since my mother died. Jack stopped talking to me once he started to date my so called best friend on the cheer squad, Kelsey.

Jerry and I are really close now. Who new? He's like my bug bro and I think I might be falling for him. Is that wrong? I mean come on, he's helped me so much this year. Every time I would break down crying because of how many friends I lost this year, he would be there telling me that everything was going to be okay when I knew that it wasn't. He helped me up when I fell down. He was my saver, yet he was just a friend. Every time I would see Kelsey she would give me glares and call me a slut or something worse.

I wouldn't cry because it was her saying it or because the word was not true,

I would cry because every time she would say it, jack would either laugh or he would look at the ground and won't make eye contact with me. Until one day, one day he hurt me so bad I decided on doing the thing that would end it all. Every last living thing would be gone in my book. That all started this one day.

March 8th, 2012. The day I almost died.

**Like it so far? Next chapter will be when I explain what jack did to kim to make her hurt so much. **

**Yes I know I am a bad bad person for leaving a cliffy….mwhahahaha**

**Until next time**

**-em**


	2. plz dont die

Kims pov

"you're so ugly!" she yelled. I growled at her slightly as she just laughed.

"why do u live kim? There is no point for you to be here. I mean all you have is who, jerry?"

I could feel the tears coming. I have never cried. Not once since except once in first grade. I didn't even cry when one of my family members died.

I finally gave in as I felt tears make their way down my cheek.

I could see jack and Kelsey stop laughing and look at me in shock.

"you happy jack! YOU BROKE ME. YOU FREAKIN BROKE THE OH-SO-TOUGH KIM CRAWFORD!"

I cried and ran. I ran until I reached the end of the dock. I took off my shirt and my shorts and dove in after taking three deep breathes.

I jumped.

I could feel the icy cold liquid mix with my body eat fighting over which one will win.

I just lay there at the bottom feeling every pain in my body disappear as did my vision.

I closed my eyes and began to stop breathing.

My lungs began to fill with water. I could feel my life going black as I see a white light right after.

I stick my hand out to touch it, but before I get to it a feel to arms grab me out of the wet substance called water.

Jack's pov

I see kim jump and run after her.

I cant believe I said that to her. I cried while trying to get her out.

I finally got to her and begn CPR.

I pushed down on her chest.

"breathe kim! Please. Im sorry. Im so…so..sorry."I bawled as I continued cpr.

"please kim breathe for me, for jerry." I continued to cry. It was my fault. After I began dating Kelsey, I became a jerk. I realized something. I don't love Kelsey. I love kim.

"kim please…..i love you" I said as she chocked up water.

** hehe u must really hate me right now**

**sorry until next time**

**-em**


	3. forgiveness is harder then u wnt it to b

**_Previously on kickn' it…. _**

**_As I see her jump I run after…._**

**_"kim please don't leave, for me, for jerry"_**

**_"I love you"_**

****_*Be my friend_

_Hold me wrap me up_

_Unfold me*_

Kim's pov

"I love you" he spoke as the water escaped from my lungs.

I coughed and coughed and coughed until I was finally done and ready to breathe.

"you love me?" I asked a little mad.

"yes." He spoke a little scared. I didn't know what to do. He has tormented me for how long?

I don't know what to say I mean he asked me why I lived.

I even loved him when he was laughing at me but now….. now I'm mad.

"YOU LOVE ME? IF U REALLY LOVED ME YOU WOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT TO ME. YOU WOULDN'T HAVE DATED KELSEY AND BECOME A JERK. IF YOU REALLY LOVE ME THEN….why did you leave us? The dojo." I looked in his eyes and only found hurt. Before I could say anything to him I heard jerry screaming my name from a far distance.

"KIM!" he saw me and ran towards me.

Once he saw I was soaked he had realized what I was trying to do.

"Jack get away from her." He said in a serious tone. If looks could kill, jack would be dead.

"Jerry…" jack was cut off by me.

"I think you should just go jack, I mean if I am as pathetic as you and Kelsey say, then I shouldn't be around you. Goodbye jack." I said getting up. I knew once I had reached jerry I would get a lecture about how stupid I was being. But this time…..he didn't give me one, he just hugged me. He broke down crying. I did that. I made jerry cry. I made jack cry. Worst of all, I made my self cry.

As jerry and I made our way inside my house, I ran to my room. I sat on my purple and black covered bed and just stared at my white wall.

"Why" I asked myself out loud. Jerry kneeled right next to me on the floor. He held my hands into his own and started to play with them.

"why do I live jerry?" I asked him as I started to cry some more.

"because you're kim Crawford. The girl I fell in love with." He said kissing me on the lips. At first I was shocked. But then I kissed back.

**Before you guys say anything…..**

**This is a kim and jack story I promise. Kim Is just confused right now. And there will be kim and jack in the next two chapters I promise.**

**Until next time **

**-em**


	4. is it the end?

_Previously on kickin it….._

_"because you're kim Crawford….the girl I fell in love with" he said kissing me. I was shocked but began to kiss back._

* * *

I finally realized what I had been doing….. I was kissing jerry.

Was this wrong? It definitely didn't feel right.

I suddenly felt my heart-ache; it felt like I was just stabbed multiple times in the heart.

I grabbed onto my chest and fell back wards.

"kim!" jerry yelled grabbing onto me. I could feel the world go dark.

Jack's pov

She will never forgive me.

I don't blame her. I have become a monster. I treated her like crap and she doesn't deserve me. She deserves better. But no matter what, I will win her back because I truly love her. I couldn't get that image out of my head. Her jumping in, and I just stood and watched to see if she would really do it.

And she _did._ I decided to go back one more time. I don't care if she still hates me, I love her and I'm going to tell her a million times if I have too.

As I began walking back I could hear jerry scream,

I ran into the house and I went up the stairs to find kim lying in jerry's arms. Her lips still a slight shade of purple and her skin looking icy cold.

_Kim_

"jerry we need to get to a hospital…."I cried, but he looked at me in shock.

"now!" I ordered him. He got up and I picked kim up bridal style.

As I got into jerry's car with him in tow, he started it and we went off.

I lightly moved the back of my hand up and down her face.

"why?" jerry asked.

"why what?" I asked

"why did you leave us….why did you leave kim if you loved her?" he asked. That's a really good question. Why did I leave the guys and the dojo, and especially kim?

"I don't know….i guess w=for the popularity. I guessed I wanted to be popular and feel like I mattered. I guess I was stupid." I said looking down to my feet.

"jack you always mattered to us. In our eyes you were popular. But then you turned on us and we became a wreck. Especially kim. You realize she had stopped eating, talking and she almost began to cut herself. You picked on her so much. You picked on all of us…"

I could feel a tear slid down my cheek. She did all those things because of me? Because I left?

"I'm so sorry jerry." I cried. He looked at me with sympathy.

"it's okay jack, everyone makes mistakes." He said.

"why don't you hate me?" I asked.

"like I said, everyone makes mistakes. And kim will be okay." He said looking back at the road.

He's right kim _will_ be okay.

"she wont forgive me…" I started.

"it will take some time but she _will_ forgive you" he smiled.

**_5 months later….._**

Kim and I are together. She finally forgave me and she admitted she loved me. We have been together ever since. It took a while but she gave in. I couldn't be happier. I can't believe I would ever make fun of her. She is so perfect in my eyes.

Don't worry jerry found a new love. Him and Kelsey are together.

They are so cute. I know I sound like a girl but it's true.

Eddie and Milton turned out to be gay….who knew .

Rudy ended up getting married, and life couldn't get better.

**Hey me again. Yup this is the end of this story I guess. If u want more chapters just tell me and I'll make more I guess. Sorry it took so long to up-date, any ways until next time….maybe**

**-em**


	5. suicide note

**hey it's me em again...**

**just want to say some words. i read this off of fb. i knew it fit into this story but too late for tht. XD.**

**instead i will type it for you now...**

Wanna kill yourself?

Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You've had yet another horrible day. You're just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you've written and rewritten over and over and over. You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time.

A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don't answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you're asleep.

He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She's screaming your name.

Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that "Mommy is crying and sissy won't wake up."

Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what's going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry.

Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. The next day at school, there's an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide.

It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves.

Your teachers think they were too hard on you.

Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they've said to you.

That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can't help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are.

Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can't handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school.

Your friends? They're sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late.

And your best friend? She's in shock. She can't believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can't cry, she can't feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out.

It's a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot.

Everyone's crying, your little brother still doesn't know you killed yourself, he's too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him.

Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn't stop for days.

It's two years later. The whole school talks to a counselor/therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn't know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls.

Your friends all go into depression.

Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn't succeed like you did, but she tried…

your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide.

Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.

People care.


End file.
